lisa morgan

This is the story of the best news I've had in over a year...

About a month ago I made the mistake of attempting to race a crit - it was a special race at the end of a crit racing workshop for women that Laura headed as a Capitelles event.  Numbers weren't ideal so I thought I'd be ok to try and sit in and make up numbers.  I have no concerns about coming last (it wouldn't be the first time!) and if I expect other women to just get out and give it a go why not show them it's not all about winning, just pushing yourself.

Unfortunately, what I hadn't tested in my slow recovery from multiple concussions, was exercise at high intensity.  I'd managed rides of varying lengths at a very very easy pace over the last few months, and in CX you can do your own thing and still feel like it was a good day out.  In a crit the whole point is to try and stick with the bunch and contest the sprints.  Hannah saw to it that no one had a show at a sprint, lapping everyone at least once (I think she came both first and second in the end) but for the first few minutes I tried to put a bit of effort in to my attempt.  Then BANG... my vision went.  I sat up and rolled around til the end and figured a good amount of rest would set things back on track like it had been doing.

After constant headaches and vision and vertigo issues, 3 weeks later I woke up and couldn't move for the pain in my head, cloud in my vision and earth moving under my feet (and I'm not in Christchurch).  Finally I admitted it was time for another consultation with a medical professional - generally with my history and symptoms the advice has been rest, rest and more rest - not easy for a pro-active/want to fix it now type personality but I'd done my best for well over a year and just sent myself hurtling backwards.  I needed to know if there was something more that could be done now.

I went away with a script and plans for bloods and probable referral to a neurologist.  Neuro referral is underway, bloods are the same as they were 18 months ago which is ok, but the hugest thing has been the treatment I walked away with has cleared up all my symptoms!!!  All my headaches appear to have been migraines, most likely caused by the impacts to my head, and all the other symptoms have been migraine related symptoms.  The consistant fatigue has probably been a result of the chronic pain. 

So all of a sudden, within the space of 24 hours, my vision became clear and it didn't hurt to open my eyes on a sunny day without sunglasses, it was as if a fog cleared from inside my head, and I felt energy flowing through both mind and body again in a way I'd forgotten it could.  I've had to take a few doses of the meds to maintain this wonderful new (and yet, in a way, old) state of mind and body but it means we are on to something and the future suddenly looks a whole lot brighter!

I've just spent the long weekend in Rotorua.  I rode 3 days in a row (being cautious and taking the shuttle to get to the more distant, fun tracks) - something I haven't done since I don't know when.  I'm tired, and my seriously unconditioned butt hurts, but I haven't had any of the nasty effects I would have had if I'd tried it any time in the last year.

It's a strange position to be in.  My injuries took over my life for a long time and now it looks like I might get control back.  I'm loathe to count my chickens, but can't help but think how amazing it will be if I can in fact get back on my bikes in some real way.  I'm in a state of disbelief at how I've felt over the last week and hoping to have more good news as things develop.  I simply can't explain the total transformation I'm experiencing at the moment but I felt it was worthy of a post, if only to mark what I hope is a turning point in my recovery.

It just goes to show... never give up (even on the days when it's really, really, really hard).  And don't stop looking til you find a great Dr!!!